Whenever I’m in public, I like to watch how couples interact. There’s a lot I can learn about a relationship through observation. I watch for genuine affection, attentiveness, conversation, touch, and respect. I can quickly assess if a couple has had a good day together, a fair day, a horrible day, or if they’re caught in a pattern of destruction.
I’m sure the relationship of a couple caught in destructive patterns did not start out that way. First there would have been that spark of attraction, that smile that melted the heart or made it leap with joy. Then would come the long nightly phone calls, and the moments counted until you could see each other again. There was the day you became engaged and excitedly told everyone how happy you were. Finally came the wedding day, with all its blessings and wonder, with all its hopes for the future and promises to be kept for a lifetime. Sweet promises.
The happiness factor lasts for a while, and you still hang on to every word your spouse needs to express. But at some point in the marriage journey, there may be an unexpected surprise. And then—a light switch turns from “on” to “off.” The light of your love starts fading into darkness.
But your story hasn’t ended—yet. There is still opportunity to search for the candles and matches and ignite that one little flicker of love that’s still faintly there. And, if you hold your breath, you can feel a gentle loving hand gently massaging your heart, trying to keep your love alive.
This was my story.
There was a time when I believed the light had gone out in my marriage. However, a new love story that was about to begin—the story of Christ’s love for me and his persistent, gentle squeezes that kept my heart beating. He wouldn’t let my love for my husband fade into nothingness. And out of what I thought was a lifeless, dark place, he kept the light on ever so slightly. That little tiny sliver of light is what kept me from ending my love story.
The Evil One feeds us the lie that our love story has died. He tries to cover that small sliver of light with his darkness. However, I am proof that one little flicker can reignite into a love that has lasted for more than thirty years. And to think . . . I once thought it had died.
My love story continues.
Copyright © 2016 Sheri Mueller, Growthtrac Ministries
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Sheri Mueller
Sheri Mueller is an LCPC who earned her M.A. in Professional Counseling from Olivet Nazarene University. A certified facilitator and trainer for PREPARE/ENRICH, Sheri has worked for more than 15 years to help individuals, premarital couples, and married couples build and maintain healthy relationships. An Adjunct Professor at Judson University and author of numerous articles and a regular column, Mentor Minute, Sheri, with her husband, Jim, founded Growthtrac Ministries. Check-out Sheri's book, "I Want Him to Want Me: How to Respond When Your Husband Doesn’t Want Sex "
